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So I had the day off yesterday, and seeing as how I need to save up for the next plane ticket, I let the office file me for a 7am gig out in Vail. Supposed to run 6 hours, cool, 7-1, back in Denver by 3, plenty of time to get homework done.
When I crawl back into the car in Vail it's dark outside, 6:58 in the PM to be precise. Don't get me wrong, I love getting paid for 12 hours of work. Another month or two of jobs like that and I'll be out to Japan or New Zealand or whatever, no problem. But that staying up past midnight doing homework, with a 5am wake-up to catch the bus the next morning...
Yeah, let's try to avoid that in the future.
Steven
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Do yourself a favor and don't see it.
Imagine tepid bathwater. The whole movie is just lukewarm. I paid to see it opening night in a packed theatre...the only people there are they people who wanted to see the Simpsons right off. Everyone was predisposed to laughter. Well, guess what, people weren't laughing all that long or hard. Sure, that doesn't mean it's cold. I would be lying if I said I didn't laugh. The movie's strongest point is it's physical schtick, which it does vividly. But the Simpsons was always a character-driven sitcom, and the characters are about as lively as the paper they were drawn on.
What surprised me was the number of families in the audience. I remember when the Simpsons first came on TV, they were a lower-middle class family on the verge of going under. Bart was really the bad kid, cursing and running away from home. I drew a picture of Bart riding a skateboard, saying "Go to hell, man!" When my mom found it she forbade me from watching the Simpsons at all. Either society has stumbled far past that point of modesty, or the Simpsons has become gentrified, but either way it was safe enough for 4 year olds to come and see with their folks.
Save your money. Rent it, or better yet, wait for the TV version. You're not missing anything now, whereas you will be missing $8 and a modicum of your pride if you pay to see it at your local Cineplex.
Steven
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Notes on Operation Kitchen Fires: Aurora -
2 theaters of operation: Peanut Butter Cookie Offensive, Internet Chili Recipe Assault.
* Field commanders unanimously agreed that cooking dried pinto beans presented difficulties with current troop experience. Suggestions include soaking beans overnight, just buying cans next time.
* Delta Squadron meets with heavy fighting against Ground Beef in Fry Pan Alley. Initial reports unclear as to whether Meat was overcooked or under. Airstrike with Tomato Paste FX-65 cannisters at 1830 hours proved equally inconclusive. However, when the smoke cleared, Fry Pan Alley was deemed under control. Kudos on this encounter go to both the Delta Squadron and the platoons involved in the pinto operation.
Civilian reports indicate low casualties. Eyewitnesses stated that "it was some damn fine chili."
* Baker Squadron met with total annihilation at the hands of a coordinated assault from the Mixing Bowls and the Cooking Oven. While engaged in light skirmishing from the Mixing Bowls, radio communication from the field indicates that the Peanut Butter situation was "creamy but uneven." When the commander and his adjuncts were wiped out in a stray flour blast, troops began an organized but shaky retreat. 8-10 minutes after the retreat began it was clear that the troops had lost their taste for mixing it up with the enemy. A half-baked attempt to break through enemy lines resulted in further casualties.
Final communication from the Baker Squadron's rear guard, shortly before they too were wiped out, was that the commanders had mistakenly employed 10 times the amount of Salt gas normally applied, and it had fallen heavily on friend and foe alike. A later survey of the battlefield reported a shameful number of lives which had been thrown away, which left a bad, saline taste in many mouths.
While Delta Squadron and the mixed units involved in the pinto operation achieved victory today, it came tempered with the total loss of Baker Squadron. Let us not forget these brave men who laid their lives down to improved the State of Cooking, whose citizens uphold the right of delicious food for all men and women. We must learn from these mistakes, not be intimidated by them, and try again tomorrow to perfect another Dish.
One Spatula, One Nation!
Carry on.
Gen. Steven S.
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With the Virginia Tech shootings I feel like I have a lot I want to discuss, but nothing to really say. A lot of people are throwing in their two cents, and all it amounts to is a massive pile of speculation. Seung-Hui's music of preference will be attacked, as will his favorite video games, if he has any of either. People will start pointing fingers at the gun industry and legislators will effectively defend Big Gun and the current understanding of the 2nd Amendment, for better or worse. Where were the parents, where were the police, why wasn't anything done in those two hours between the shootings, so on and so on...
At this point all the commentary is pretty much speculation. NBC has already gotten a hold of Seung-Hui's final manifesto, and them and other media outlets will probably exhume and display a number of that English major's writings. It will pretty much all be disturbing. Interviews with teary eyed students, fragmented first-hand accounts of the shootings, psych reports and the 2 cents of every school councilor who had dealings with the shooter...it all might add up to the disturbing portrait of a mass murderer.
Massive, steaming piles of commentary will be devoted to the "why" for the VT massacre. I would just like everyone to keep in mind that Seung-Hui was not born with a pair of pistols in his hands. He was a human being, like all the rest of us. He was a kid once, like we all were. That he was able to plan and carry out the murder of 32 people and then shoot himself in the head makes him look like a monster...
...but he was just a human being.
Steven
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